Best.Video.Ever.

What Would Nobody Do?

On a friend's recent Facebook post about separation of church and state, a mutual friend said that Atheism was also a religion. In return I quoted Bill Maher:

"Atheism is a religion like abstinence is a sex position". 

I did not want to hijack the thread so I left it at that, while he went on to write  "Atheism is a belief system that governs the way you live your life and view the world, just like my faith in Jesus does the same for me".

My absence of belief is not a belief system and does not guide how I live my daily life. Religion was best described by Erich Fromm who said it provides an orientation to life and object of devotion. If you worship the almighty dollar and laissez faire economics is your guiding light, then it's fair to say that capitalism is like a religion.  However Atheism doesn't compare.

Unlike most religions, which rely on scripture or church leaders to dictate beliefs and behaviors, I use reason and logic to form opinions about individual situations as they occur and unfold. For example, I think Bill Maher's quote is spot on, but while listening to a recent show I agreed with a point from a Christian panelist. While Maher supported the argument that some of the worst crimes occur in the name of religion, this panelist said basically that there are shitty people who do shitty things, sometimes because they think God wants them to and other times because they are self-serving assholes (he said it nicer than this -  I'll give the god-fearing folks points for politeness). I don't immediately agree with everything Bill Maher says just because he is a fellow Atheist.

I appreciate the perspective from my Christian friend, but I completely disagree. Atheism is not a religion or like a religion. To be sure perhaps I'll attempt to start a tax-exempt Atheist church. Upon your next visit to this blog if you see "WWND?" bracelets for sale, you'll know I've changed my mind on the subject.

What You See is What You Get

Have you ever watched someone hurt themselves on TV or in a movie - perhaps a stubbed toe, a knee to the groin, or insert Three Stooges movie here - and winced at the sight? Perhaps you involuntarily grabbed and cradled the vicariously afflicted appendage? This is due to mirror neurons. Although consciously and logically you know that you are safe and nothing happened to you, some part of your ancient cave-person brain does not.

Good old-fashioned sexism seems to be on the rise again in this country. White, male politicians and theologians want to outlaw birth control and are basically making abortion illegal via over-regulation, including mandatory waiting periods and ultrasounds. What's next? You have to name it and buy your zygote its 1st birthday present before they allow you to abort? They want to go back to a simpler time of women as second class citizens who get married, stay home, crank out babies, and leave everything else to them. So where is all of this woman-hating ideology stemming from?

The causes are many, but one obvious answer is glaring in it's omission. We live in a culture that by and large omits women from politics, religion, and the media. We are over 50% of the population yet our representation in major political, religious, and media institutions are much less:

• 17% of the US Senate and House of Representatives
• 12% of Governors
• 9% of Mayors in top US cities
• 2 % of Fortune 500 CEOs, 6 % of top earners, 8 % of top leadership positions, and 16 % of board directors and corporate officers.
• 15% of TV writers
• 5% of Hollywood Directors
• Of the 15 US Protestant denominations that do ordain women, an average of 12% of the clergy are female.
• 0% are Catholic Priests, Bishops, Archbishops, or Popes*
• 0% of Judea-Christian deities are female*

* I didn't research these, but I'm pretty sure they are right.

What you see is a bunch of men telling us women how it's gonna be. Your political leaders, your clergy and holy texts, even your night out at the movies are more often than not from a man's point of view. It's easy to see how overt, sexist pablum so easily seeps into the minds of conservatives. All throughout our society the subconsciousness message is that men are running the show.

One of the immediate solutions is consume more women-friendly media, culture, and religion. Seek out TV shows, books, and podcasts that are written and produced by women. The next time you get a call from the Democratic party asking for donations, ask about their plans to recruit more female leaders and candidates.

The most important change is the hardest. Can you really stand by a religion whose texts make you subservient to men? Whose scripture says you are responsible for original sin? Whose leadership and hierarchy excludes you almost completely? I realize that religious conversions, including to agnostism or atheism, are difficult. At least seek out alternate scriptures or canons, for example the Gospel of Mary Madgalene and other Gnostic texts.

Finally, perhaps this picture will get those mirror neurons firing in the right direction:

Boobies Boobies Everywhere but not a Drop to Drink

It's no secret that breasts are used to promote anything and everything. Baywatch is a testament to this through it's use of slow motion montages of glistening wet, busty lifeguards running along the beach.

However, did you know that breasts are also used to feed infant children? It's obvious from this clip that the producers of Baywatch don't want you to know that. In this scene we see a new mom taking the girls, and also her daughter, out for a jog. After her workout she feeds her child but that's where the boobs disappear. With no knockers in sight, breastfeeding is merely suggested by the fact that her tank top sleeve is off to the side of her shoulder.

I have no problem with gratuitous displays of bouncing boobies, but don't hide the fact that their primary purpose is to feed babies. Although this is a 90s TV show, sadly I don't think much has changed.

The Final Curtain

I'm glad that the curtain is closing on 2011. This year I lost both of my grandparents and my cat Coco, who had been with me since college. I'm fortunate that in my life up until this point I hadn't known much loss, but this year I got a triple whammy. Maybe next year will be better than the last.

For Coco, I knew she only had a few months left due to an inoperable tumor. During her final weeks she was reclusive and spent most of her time sleeping on a blanket in my closet. Towards the end of May it was getting to the point where I knew it was time, so I scheduled an appointment with the vet for the next morning. Coco seemed to know as well; she came out of hiding and spent some quality time with Andy and I that evening. The next day I held her as the strong anesthetics caused her to pass out, and she purred in my arms as she fell asleep for good.

A few month after Coco, my Grandma Alpha passed away. She did not want to go gentle into that good night, and a few times came back from the brink when we thought she wouldn't make it. She was a fiery, opinionated women who wasn't going to let Death take her that easily. In the end, my Dad and sister were on the way to Dayton after a call from the nursing home, informing them that Alpha was slipping away. They got delayed by a powerful thunderstorm that slowed highway traffic to a crawl. It was a sign, and they knew that she was leaving in a blaze of thunder and lightening. They got to the home a few minutes after she had passed.

A few weeks before Christmas my Grandpa Ben joined Alpha. He was a calm and easy-going man, which I think I inherited from him in some measure. He was a WWII Navy veteran who survived a bombing of the USS Savannah off the cost of Italy. A few minutes beforehand he was called to the opposite side of the ship, which saved his life. Over 200 soldiers died during the attack.

He'd seen death many more times than one should, so in the end he accepted that his time was at hand with peace and appreciation for 90 years on this Earth. About a week before he passed my Dad and his sisters were visiting him in the nursing home on what happened to be Karaoke day. Although he'd broke his glasses and could barely see, he and my dad sang the Sinatra classic "My Way". His fellow nursing home residents, who were barely cognizant most of the time, burst into applause. It brought tears to the chaplain's eyes, who thanked him and my dad for such a touching moment.

They all did it their way, and when my time comes I hope I do too. I miss and love you all.

You Can't Handle the Truth

The smarter you are, the more likely you are to have more extreme views, whether they be conservative or liberal. Intelligent people are better at finding corroborating evidence to support their claims. When I first read in the New York Times that many Tea Party members are of above average intelligence, my knee-jerk liberal reaction was "No freakin' way!" Now I see that most of the organizers are in fact smart, perhaps even genius, when it comes to manipulating their idiot base into doing their bidding.

How does one get to the truth of an issue? How do you start out with the questions, instead of starting with your answer then finding proof to support it?

If your first girlfriend broke your heart, does that mean that all women are heartless witches? If you are not white but your boss is, when you don't get a promotion does that mean your boss is a racist? If you know one lazy person who gets Food Stamps, do you assume that everyone on Food Stamps must be a good-for-nothin'cheat?

You shouldn't let prejudice and emotions get in the way of forming opinions, but how do you get past the past? How do you step outside of your emotions, often strong and born from fear and pain, to objectively assess a person or situation? There are racist bosses and ballbreaker girlfriends, so how do you also let prior experience factor into the equation in equal measure?

I find myself asking lots of questions yet I have no answers. That's the truth.

Sympathy Protest